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Astro-nomic Climate Change BS

rangers stadium

One of the favorite tactics of the devotees of the Church of Climatology is to diminish heretical statements by pointing to their holy scriptures.  To wit: “The Science!”  Their defense dictates that unless you have a dozen peer-reviewed Climate Reports on your resume, you are not allowed to have an opinion on whether or not we revert to an agrarian lifestyle to appease the Climate Gods.

Never mind that it is not the scientists who are suggesting such drastic societal changes be made.  No…they are merely the scribes in this Church.  The holy prophets of the media, the world of politics and mainstream climate activism are the ones interpreting the Holy Scriptures in such a way.

The latest Papal Bull was issued this week by Bloomberg Magazine.  In this Op-Ed, the writer/acolyte informs us that Climate Change is the reason the Texas Rangers are building a new stadium with a retractable roof and air conditioning.  Evidently it just now occurred to them that summers in Texas are hot.  Film at 11.

colt45I’m not a scientist, ‘tis true.  But I am a baseball historian.  Let me tell you a little story about another Major League team in Texas.  They began in 1962 as the Houston Colt 45’s.  They played their games in an open air stadium (pictured, left) that offered NO shade from the Texas heat and flying varmints.  Houston pitcher Larry Dierker once quipped that the women in Houston don’t wear perfume—they wear mosquito repellent.

astrodomeThe heat was bad enough to prompt the team to explore an ambitious undertaking.  An INDOOR stadium!  In 1965, the Houston Astrodome, the Eighth Wonder of the World, opened.  (pictured, right)  It was the first successful use of synthetic grass, called “Astroturf.”  The team changed their name and the rest is history.

It is worth noting that 1965 was well before SUVs and Al Gore’s polar bears.  That is to say, in the days before all this Global Warming took place, the heat was STILL enough to prompt out-of-the-box solutions on ways to beat it.

That is one of many reasons why it is laughable to hear that a 2019 decision by the Texas Rangers (Located just a couple of hours northwest of Houston) could be attributed to hot weather.  The intrepid Climate Servant even included a handy-dandy chart showing that it’s getting HOTTER in the Dallas area!  Well, not really.  The graph shows the normal fluctuations you routinely get with something as volatile as the weather.  In fact, the average daytime temperature for home games this year was a whopping .6 degrees higher than the average over the past 75 years.

Indeed, our prophet assures us it was Climate Change that “ruined outdoor baseball at Globe Life Park.”  Really?  Did it suddenly get hot in mid-Texas this summer?  No.  Even the data from your sacrosanct scientists shows that it has always been hot.  And if it is ANY hotter today, it is by tenths of degrees.  That is not enough to prompt a $1.2 billion dollar investment.  What IS enough is the realization that more people will spend a little more money to enjoy a game in a climate-controlled environment.  Especially since we have fashioned a society where people spend most of their waking hours in places where the temperature is around 72 degrees.

This is not evil Climate Change driving the decision to build a palatial new stadium…it’s evil Capitalism.  Wonderful, beautiful Capitalism.  The same Capitalism that has led to the most prosperous period in human history.  The same Capitalism that gives nimrods like this Op-Ed writer a comfortable place to type from as he frets about the evils of red meat and internal combustion engines.

Play Ball!  And turn the AC up!


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